My heart cried, an unsaid pain;
Blood bubbled, but the body frail;
Rants and rants; cries and cries;
Reasons were not enough;
Louder, louder; I screamed and shouted;
and the heart kept bleeding all through.
Why and what; the eye questioned,
Confrontation was not the answer.
A cloud of gloom on thoughts was smitten;
Arguments, arguments; the mind rattled;
Time, time; the soul whispered;
Scars and wounds; with time was forgotten!
On the top of the shelf, it was kept
Unused over years, it was left
Losing all its shiny, steely edge
It couldn’t even make an etch.
It was a blunt knife
On top of the shelf, it laid without a life
Over the years it got rusted
Neither cared for nor dusted
I thought I was the same
With no innovation I was lame
But hope is always there
And to our instincts if we adhere
The blunt knife can always be mended
Following the trail your conscience recommended
I was trying to fix those pieces, collecting each one of them carefully from the floor. It was a whole marble floor and they were shining due to the reflection of sunlight that hit the floor through the open windows. It was my favorite mirror and I had to fix it by any means. It was not the same, how hard I try…there were cracks in it, visible to me and pinching me, for I wanted it to be the same as before. Disheartened and depressed, I went to the common room. “Rishtey Sheeshe jaise hote hain, agar ek bar toot jayen toh daraarein reh jaate hain”, was the thing I heard from one of the leading ladies of a famous Hindi serial which was being played in the T.V. It meant that relationships are like glass, once broken, the cracks remain forever…
I went back to my room. My room-mates were sleeping. It was dark and the fan was on its full speed. There was a soft, empty bed in front of me and no option left for me other than lying on that cozy thing. But I wasn’t sleepy nor did I want to. Then, my mind took a flight and landed onto the land of thoughts concerning my mirror and all that I heard about it just few minutes earlier. I first visualized my broken mirror with cracks all over it and then recalled the words that the lady in that idiot box told. I questioned to myself, “Are these relations really as fragile as glass? Do they break very easily? And even if they get patched up, the cracks remain?”
Then the tinsel box in my head engaged itself in answering the questions raised. It recalled of many incidents and several situations where the words were proved right. My eyes did witness many such cases and my ears heard such things over and over again. Due, one small word there is so much misunderstanding that, people forget all the good things they once had and they leave everything for a small cause. Breaking is something is very much easier than building up something. All these were going on in my mind and eyes slowly were closing; may be due to the perfect surrounding I was present. And finally, I couldn’t listen what my mind kept on saying.
I got up only after listening to the phone ring. I was still sleepy and my mom called me. I was little irritated and she little worried. Then clash of words started in between us and I cut the call. I was upset because this was the one of the many times that this thing was happening with me on that day. Then all the words that I heard and was thinking before I was sleeping came into my mind and the disappointment in me increased. I began thinking that is our relation the same or things have changed. Does mom loves me the same or I have the same respect for her. Did our relation get a crack? I was worried for I didn’t want that to happen. I was worried, angry and confused. Then, suddenly the phone rang again and I saw that mom was calling. I immediately picked up the call and two voices at once spoke sorry. All my worries, thoughts were gone and there was only smile on my face. My mom told me a lot of sweet things and I was very happy. Nothing but peace was there in my mind.
Whatever it was I realized one thing from all these things that the relations may be like glass but love is much stronger than all other things. A relation bonded by true love is stronger than glass. Even it falls down many times there will not be any cracks in them. Love is above all and everything. There is nothing beyond it. It is the universal language spoken by eyes and heard by heart and can be understood by everyone sooner or later.
Disclaimer: These are purely my feelings and experience. It is just my opinion and never meant to be imposed on anyone
Often, some situations pop up where I fail to do something or I am wrongly taken by the person in front of me. Rage, anger, unparliamentarily words…all sorts of unpleasant behavior imposed on me. Now, I have two choices, either I bear all that or give away whatever I got. Often, it such happens that I bear with all these but sometimes I even give back, depending on my state of mind.
A gush of blood flows into each and every capillary, more than what it actually do…The head feels heavy, heart beats faster than usual and the face turns red. The brain starts generating all the negative impulses and I feel like ripping apart the person responsible for the cause. Now, the choice comes. Either I give way for my mouth or hands to perform or my eyes to perform the rest. When my mouth starts performing, all the negative impulses generated by the brain, come out and mix with air. My brain gets relaxed that the energy it has used for generating all those feelings have been utilized and I are actually successful in generating the same feeling that the other person has generated in I just a while ago. But if I chose the other thing, my lachrymal glands use the energy to produce tears. Slowly, with the tears flowing, the energy is totally finished and I calm down. Once I calm down, my brain starts thinking rationally and thus I realize the cause and finally get convinced that I did very right in staying calm.
Now, the point to ponder is that one is right, giving away or bearing. Whenever I tried to give back, I experienced a bitter experience for at that moment I feel light but later my conscience always points me that this has just created a crack in the mirror which will never be repaired and made as same as before. But, instead if I stayed calm at that moment, my head fills with a dualism and turns out to be a battlefield. But finally, peace fills in my head. Even the person in front thinks and everything gets sorted out. ‘O my God! Such an experience’; never again should we face such a situation, we think and finally things are back to normal.
They flow during the happy and sad times,
Making the eyes moist and the cheeks wet,
They roll down like small round rain drops,
They glow in the shimmering light,
They flow and flow till we feel light.
There were days when they used to flow,
Flow like a spring from top a mountain,
But now the season has changed,
The heat has sore high in the sky,
The spring has now almost died down.
The tears hardly roll down my eyes,
My heart says me that I have become hard,
Now I am grown-up and so I understand things,
But sometimes it is hard, really very hard,
I want to go back to those days where,
At least I had them with me during my days of happiness and sadness…my tears!!!